World Free Stuff

There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party… Then he had a bright idea. When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt and no socks on. “What the hell are you supposed to be?” asked the host. “A premature ejaculation,” said the man. “I just came in my pants!”

Deep Salvage Pick Reminiscent of the deep sea exploration to find the Titanic ship, you probe deep into your nasal passages.

Utensil Pick When fingers, and even your thumb, just aren’t enough to get the job done to your satisfaction.

Extra Pick When you have been digging for nuggets hours upon hours and suddenly you hit the jackpot! Excitement only equalled by winning the lottery.

Depression Pick When you’re sad, and the only way to fill the void is to pick so hard and fast that the agony overcomes your feeling of remorse and depression.

Pick A Lot What we would call abnormal amounts of picking. Anything in the three digit realm we consider a bit too much for a 24 hour time frame.

Kiddie Pick When you’re by yourself and you uninhibitedly twist your forefinger into your nostril with childlike joy and freedom. And the best part is, there’s no time limit!

Camouflaged Kiddie Pick When, in the presence of other people, you wrap your forefinger in a tissue, then thrust it in deep and hold back the smile.

Fake Nose Scratch When you make believe you’ve got an itch but you’re really trolling the nostril edge for stray boogers.

Making A Meal Out Of It You do it so furiously, and for so long, you’re probably entitled to dessert.

Surprise Pickings When a sneeze or laugh causes snot to come hurling out of your nose, and you have to gracefully clean it off your shirt.

Autopick The kind you do in a car, when no one’s looking. Also can mean automatic pick, the one you do when your not even thinking about it, at work, while talking to a co-worker, during a meeting….

Pick Your Brains Done in private, this is the one where your finger goes in so far, it passes the septum.

Pick And Save When you have to pick it quickly, just when someone looks away, and then you pocket the snot so they don’t catch on to what you did.

Pick And Flick Snot now becomes a weapon against your sister and others in range around you.

Pick And Stick You wanted it to be a “Pick and Flick,” but it stubbornly clings to your fingertip.

Pipe Cleaner Pick The kind where you remove a piece of snot so big, it improves your breathing by 90%.