World Free Stuff

These are extracts from actual letters sent to various councils and housing associations throughout the uk.
I put an age cap on this as the letters contain rude but amusing when misread. there are more but there not as good as these.

1. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

2. And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

3. I wish to report that the tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof, I think it was that bad wind the other night that blew them off.

4. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path, my wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

5. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen. 50% of the walls are damp 50% have crumbling plaster and the rest are plain filthy.

6. Will you please send a man to look at my water? It is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

7. I want to complain about the farmer across the road, every morning at 6:00am his cock wakes me up and now its getting to much for me.

8. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night.

9. Please send a man with the right tools to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

And the last one cracks me up XD
10. My bush is really overgrown around the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.

You may also like these :D

• Letters To God From Kids
• Deal Or No Deal
• Orange Arts
• Little Boy Asks For Money From God
• Funny Quotes