World Free Stuff

This case happened in a hospital’s Intensive care ward where Patients
always died in the same bed and on all Sunday morning at 11 a.m, regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural.

No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM.

So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m. all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off evil……..

Just when the! clock struck 11…….
and then……

then…..

then……..

Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and Unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner

A man 80 years of age married a young lady. A year later he carried her to the hospital, and she had a baby.
The nurse said to the man: “At your age, how do you do that?”
The man answered: “You just have to keep the motor running”.
Another year passes, and the man carries her back to the hospital, another baby.
The same nurse said to the man and asked: “You are something else, how do you do that?”. He said: “I told you that you just have to keep the motor running”.
Another year and back to the hospital for another baby.
The same nurse said: “You are unbelievable, how do you do that?!”.
He said: “You got to keep the motor running”.
She answered: “Well, you better change oil, because this one came out black”.

A man walks into a sperm bank and declares, “I’m a star athlete, and have an I.Q. of 165, and I’d like to make a donation”.

The nurse gives him a sealed cup and directs him to a private room. Twenty minutes later, the man hasn’t come out, the nurse knocks on the door. “Is there a problem?”

The man says, “I’m so embarrassed. I used my right hand. I used my left hand. I poured cold water on it and hot water on it. Could you help me?”

The nurse replied, “I don’t usually do this, but you are kind of cute”. She gets on her knees and begins gratify him orally.

“I really appreciate this”, said the man, “but I need help getting the cap off the jar”.

A man at a retirement home was walking around with his zipper down holding his penis.
A young nurse says “Why are you doing that?”
He replies,”It died today.”
“Oh that’s terrible!”, the nurse replied
The next day the man has his penis hanging outside of his pants again.
The same nurse says, “I thought it died yesterday.”
The man replies, “It did. Today is the viewing”

A doctor was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly afterward, she told him that she was pregnant. Not wanting his wife to know, he gave the nurse a sum of money and asked her to go to Italy and have the baby there.
“But how will I let you know the baby is born?” she asked.

He replied, “Just send me a postcard and write “spaghetti” on the back. I’ll take care of expenses.” Not knowing what else to do, the nurse took the money and flew to Italy.

Six months went by, and then one day the doctor’s wife called him at the office and said, “Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail today from Europe, and I don’t understand what it means.”

The doctor said, “Just wait until I get home and I will explain it to you.”

Later that evening the doctor came home, read the postcard, and fell to the floor with a heart attack. Paramedics rushed him to the hospital emergency room. The head medic stayed back to comfort the wife. He asked what trauma had precipitated the cardiac arrest.

So the wife picked up the card and read: “Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti – Two with sausage and meatballs; two without.”

Doctor: “Nurse, how is that little boy doing, the one who swallowed ten quarters?”
Nurse: “No change yet.”